A Two-Minute Peak Into the Mind of Someone In Holland During Carnival

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That’s a church. That’s a giant church with a carnival flag on it. And underneath the church there are masses of extremely drunk and costumed humans. It’s like a huge mockery of life. There are fake news reporters, adults in diapers, kids dancing in the bars (real kids), and old people chugging beers. Maybe I’m just drunk or maybe I’m drunk and this is actually happening. Let’s run that thought.

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It makes sense because it’s pre-lent. This weekend let’s people be whatever lusty self they want to be or release their alter egos or whatever. That’s a scary thought… Your alter ego wears a diaper, sir.

Lars just told me the lyrics to the song that’s ok translates to “On top of a large mountain there stands a little midget” and it’s just looping. I’m dying over here. What’s a little midget doing up there anyway? Also maybe they lied to me about his name because there’s no way it’s actually Lars right? No I take it back. He’s definitely a Lars.

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I wonder how long that little midget stood on the mountain. And I wonder how he got off. Omg what if he’s still up there like oh hey guys nice song care to rescue me now?

I need to tranquilo.

Okay no more thinking about midgets tanning on top of mountains. Haha I meant standing but if I was a midget on top of a mountain I’d def try to get some sun. Okay seriously new topic. I can’t stop laughing and the poor midget is probably stuck and realistically it’s cold and snowy so he couldn’t tan even if he wanted to.

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This beer is crisp and delicious and this is a Nick and Liz sort of j that I’ve been chiefin solo. Maybe I should take a break. Putin just walked by holding a beer. That’s a sign I should continue. Dude but on that note – Russia. How are we here doing this and a few chess moves to the right Putin is causing chaos in the Ukraine. I’m sad I don’t know where the Ukraine is. I need to read more books.

I should also stop writing and join the rest of the world, but I’m a little scared of it out there and it’s sort of fun to just chill and enjoy the funny language and cold beer and icy wind and deep inhales and loud folk music (don’t start about the midget again) and how it’s all happening under a church! Only in Europe? Nah. Yotso!

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